Three things your mother should have told you about.
Sometimes, tough love is exactly what you need. Sometimes, it takes a friend (or a stranger) to tell you what your parents should have taught you. Sometimes, someone just has to say the thing you’re not supposed to say. Well, today is your lucky day! I’m the friend that’s going to tell you what your mother (and/or father) didn’t. Yes. I do have time today. The Etiquette No One Taught You:
Kids Birthday Parties
If a parent is throwing a birthday party for their kid at any facility not their home, they are probably paying a per capita fee. That means, unless you have specifically cleared it with the birthday kid’s parents, do not bring extra people. Please read this next line carefully.
Multiple children from the same household still means multiple gifts for the birthday kid.
The birthday kid may be friends with one of your children. That does not give you the right to bring all of your kids to the party. Why should the birthday parents have to foot the bill for all of your children at their child’s celebration?
In the event that you do bring all of your children, then all of your kids should have separate gifts to give. Or, your gift should be a nicer, more expensive gift.
And I don’t want to hear that the birthday parents say that it is okay to bring your other children. From experience, you know it costs money to feed and gift each and every child. It is still very impolite for you to take advantage of their kindness by showing up with all of your kids and one cheap present.
Baby Showers/Sprinkles
Countless times, people ask for things that they themselves wouldn’t do for others. This is bad behavior. If someone you know recently had a baby, and you gifted their baby nothing, you should not feel comfortable asking for a gift from them. Whether they had a baby shower or not, they are still birthing a baby. Why have your hand out to receive, when you gifted nothing? Not okay.
Wedding/Marriage
You get married and have a grandiose wedding, with your guests spending thousands to participate and celebrate you. Soon after, one of your guests gets married in a courthouse ceremony and maybe doesn’t invite you at all. Guess what? You still owe them a grandiose gift.
The moral of the story is: Treat people the way you want to be treated. And if people have treated you a certain way, return the favor unapologetically.
We often talk about showing people how to treat us in relationships, but that doesn’t just apply to romantic partners. Some people are users and some simply don’t know any better. Someone has to let the people know. I know it seems unfair to have to raise someone else’s grown children, but sometimes, you have to educate for the greater good. If for nothing else, just #doitfortheColeture. Finally, you have been enlightened. The Etiquette No One Taught You.